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I know no one named Hugh Mann, but I’m regularly queried if I’m human.

In truth, h’wever, that began long ago when my following of an odd beat caught the attention of classmates. As Mark Twain quipped, “It’s not easy being excentric.”

If you’re going to do so (by choice or necessity) be prepared to pay up. Valid eccentricity needs be paid for in full.

But here’s a quirkier, more peculiar thing than having my humanity challenged. It’s, these days, the doubters and questioners are plugged into a stable and filtered continuous source of AC, a true insult to those inclined DC, Lucy.

Curious that these interrogators (or are they cyber crocs) seem of a common, uninspired mind that shown a pic of a wire cage a human would know this means birds. But not birds we might normally cage; budgies, canaries, pair of Keats or pare rots.

No. The inquiring robot mind shows songbirds.

Well, who am I to argue, which in fact I can’t because I have to deal with a follow-up robot test of my humanity (or patience) with another human-discriminating puzzle such as “What eats from a cat bowl?”

These robots never met my little cousin or my malamute, able to empty a cat bowl in a single lick.

It amuses me to think that a robot is trying to prevent falsification, a trick 100% human.

If I may go back to Sam C. and one-in-the-same Mark T, real honesty doesn’t rely on witnesses.

Honesty is an inner sense more than an external impression. People, such as me, who think themselves honest might be the greater risk simply by not questioning myself with sufficient fervor. I know (quite well, truth be told) others so verifiably honest they seem to not give a passing thought to theft they can live with.

What mean I?

Simply that totally upstanding academic and religious lights take with glad hearts semi-annual trips to do good work according to the season. Cold months their work is done primarily in the SW whereas summertime favors hotels and convention centers in the NE.

The importance of the work often requires first-class fares to places with fine food and accommodation so there’ll be less distraction from the important work.

What is that work? I have asked, then to learn it was nothing you or I might recognize. The labor of the many Hercules appears centered around tax-exempt status and how to get more funding to continue the great work.

I don’t lie saying the people I’ve known who are so involved were sincere, conscientious, committed and upstanding worthies of their cause, some who have done their noble work for decades. They are, so speeching, the real deal.

I like (and thus the friendship) along with respect them, but also, without laboring them with my view, think them self-congratulating frauds, the best kind, by the way. Yup-a-roo, they are doing good and are not about to stand aside on the path of do-gooding for anything-anyone no how.

Conviction is crucial.

Well of course that’s a fine pose, Twain (I’m a bit stuck with him this time) was seldom shy commenting on the habits and view of the ultra-good and pious of his day.

They haven’t changed. Language and style is different, but the routine persists down to the harumph accompanying an outsider questioning. Was never lost on me that questioning the good plunks the questioner forever in the camp of the bad, ill and unwanted. The good are almost universal in their absolute disdain for the questioner or sayer of “wait a minute.”

Good work shouldn’t have to wait, after all, well until the next meeting at a location suitably far from and appealing to the good-minded Midwesterner.

Excuse my sarcasm, nastier, perhaps, because I like and respect the people doing good so blindly and ineffectively. They believe. They’re truly sincere in commitment to advancing, progressing and doing good.

But in my experience I saw virtually no result. Fine with me if you take a trip to recharge or get away. Good. But doing essentially that paid for by charity seems to me, no matter the degree of pious or unctuous sincerity point to places over on the dishonest scammer side of life.

I sense this (maybe too much so) from many years of experience seeing how easy it was for the well-intended to stray over into an attitude of “I deserve this.” Here’s the simple thing as I see it: “Not Your Money.”

How often have I seen a someone present their “really good” idea and not pay a rip of attention to who pays and why. How often did I rankle and make enemies saying, “Yes, that’s a good idea but it is not our mission nor is it what people have donated towards.”

Especially with public or donated funding you need to be alert to wandering down the abuse of trust lane.

Do tax dollars coming to your organization or donations from the public flow to your group to fund semi-annual resort meetings?

If people donate for educational projects should any of that money go to an annual award banquet?

A rationale I heard often was, “Oh, they understand and won’t mind.”

Maybe so. But, if money was donated for purpose X should any of it be spent on a party?

I lean no as misuse of funds. Separate donations or funding might be sought for the banquet. That’s OK. But if you’re supposed to be buying school supplies converting funds for a banquet is if nothing else questionable.

As humans, nice-good people are wholly capable of selfish acts and of justifying their indulgence with the sincerest and straightest faces. Makes them wonderful prospects for politicians.

In my view, if a worthy cause sticks to business and does what it’s supposed to there is some chance of success. But when the worthy cause becomes diffuse and is diluted, then the original task languishes and we end up with a backlog. The prime mission should come first.

Too often popularized good ideas cause efforts to weaken and concerns to grow in severity. The process of honesty never requires the prefix “due,” appended after failure.