Forrest Johnson

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Thu. Apr. 5th, 2012

National Union of Friendly Americans under assault—again

Forrest Johnson

The National Union of Friendly Americans (NUFA) held an emergency meeting at Camp Shack International Labor Temple early this week as the slave masters closed in on the hard-earned workplace gains earned over the past century, rights that have allowed freedom and dignity and a small measure of the democratic process to be exercised

Thu. Mar. 22nd, 2012

The world has gone crazy

Forrest Johnson

The yellow bird with black wings flies past our patio here on the Mexican west coast. The now dry jungle crowds to the edge of the ocean and a few miles back in the hills the squatters eke out a living. Their meager fields host skinny goats and cows, a few stalks of maize and slight banana trees. In town, the familiar market has finally started to feel the loss of regular customers, a

Fri. Mar. 16th, 2012

There’s a world of worry and fear out there

Forrest Johnson

The motto “Learning more can’t hurt,” coined by the good folks at the North Shore Neighbors, sure is appropriate in these days of myopia, ignorance, and foolishness.

Thu. Mar. 8th, 2012

All we can do is try to be nice to each other

Forrest Johnson

“Just try to be nice to people,” my grandmother always said. “You can’t change who they are or why they are. All you can do is try to be nice to people.” My grandmother was a spiritual woman who believed in the ways of Jesus and knew how to get rid of warts by rubbing them with a piece of bacon under a full moon and then having a third party hide the bacon under a rock. It seemed to work. She could also find water with a forked willow stick, sang in

Thu. Mar. 1st, 2012

National Union of Friendly Americans under assault—again

Forrest Johnson

The National Union of Friendly Americans (NUFA) held an emergency meeting at Camp Shack International Labor Temple early this week as the slave masters closed in on the hard-earned workplace gains earned over the past century, rights that have...

Fri. Feb. 17th, 2012

The free market has me suspicious about the food market

Forrest Johnson

Oh, to be a capitalist, a free market capitalist, in the industrial grade food business. It can’t get any better as long as people still mate and produce more little consumers as blind as their parents when it comes to eating habits. Hey, don’t get me wrong. I’m no saint when it comes to the delights of food and the revving up of serotonin levels at the table of plenty. There are no kettle chips I can resist. The best I can do to exercise my will is not enter that aisle of bli

Thu. Feb. 2nd, 2012

Kill the unions and the working class and bow to the economocracy

Forrest Johnson

Once again I’m trying to wrap my mind around an irony of sorts. The irony is much larger than my feeble leftist mind. Now the New Conservative Neanderthal Party (NCNP) is the compassionate party, the one to look out for the interests of ...

Fri. Jan. 20th, 2012

My debt ceiling will be raised once again

Forrest Johnson

Talk of raising the nation’s debt ceiling, minus the hubbedy-do we saw last summer they say, stirred me into fiscal action. Dredging up an idea from that recent past seemed appropriate.

Fri. Dec. 30th, 2011

The snow dance will be applied soon

Forrest Johnson

The results are in. The weather is screwy. In jest, my dad used to blame abnormal weather patterns on the Chinese. He even said they might be tinkering with gravity. But the problem is ...

Fri. Dec. 16th, 2011

Poor thinking a tough nut to crack

Forrest Johnson

Once again the National Union of Friendly Americans (NUFA) has been called upon to assist reticent nations and citizens in coming to terms with climate change.

Fri. Dec. 9th, 2011

The employees lose their jobs when the smoke clears

Forrest Johnson

Are you a parent? Are you a parent company? Would someone please tell me the difference between the two? What is a subsidiary? Would that be akin to a brother, a sister, a cousin?

Fri. Dec. 2nd, 2011

NUFA creates Super Dooper Committee to solve deficit

Forrest Johnson

Doomed from the very beginning, the legislative “super committee” failed to craft a measure that would have begun to nibble away at the nation’s looming deficit. As the old saying goes, however, within every dark cloud is a silver lining.

Fri. Nov. 18th, 2011

Out of our realm and into cholesterol

Forrest Johnson

The Exalted Shack Master and a single subject recently paid a visit to faraway Camp Cholesterol and boy did we have fun. It is deer season after all.

Fri. Nov. 11th, 2011

The occupation of Camp Shack is underway

Forrest Johnson

The Occupy Camp Shack movement began in earnest last week only hours before the opening of deer season. The protesters, mired in the 90 percent of the population that controls 27 percent of the wealth, indicated it was their intention...